Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Yes? What's that?

The last topic in the Five for Ten series is "yes". Help me! I seem to have lost this word from my vocabulary. It's true. I don't say it. I'm not sure I know how.

There are a few things parenting has taught me. I fear this has resulted in the lack of use of the word YES. Somewhere between "know what you you're going to say before you say it" and keeping my little monsters from being spoiled, the word YES went away. I'm not mean. I just can't commit and it was born out of necessity. In any event, here are the alternatives I use regularly.

Sure - in function, this word captures the essence of YES without actually having to SAY the word. Used in very limited scope.

Perhaps - used often when I *think* the answer will be YES. Unfortunately this must not always be the case because my little one's response when I say this alternative: "Perhaps not, Mommy?" Busted.

It's okay with me, but go ask your Dad - used consistently now that the kids seem to making their own social plans. This refrain is great. It puts all the blame on Dad should the answer be "no". And, it has the added bonus of making me out to be super spouse for "taking my husband's feelings into account and checking with him". Nice all the way around.

Maybe - used interchangeably with "perhaps". See notes above. Same rules apply.

I think so - You still sound good, but you leave yourself an out. Used at the office multiple times a day. What do you expect from a project manager?!

We'll see - Sets expectations low, but you don't appear to be shooting down the concept outright without due consideration.

I don't know - the ultimate in ambivalence. Often times results in persistent hounding by children. Use infrequently to maintain sanity.

I just hate to be nailed down to something. My life is too crazy, too hectic. I can't commit to anything. I never know when kid 1, 2 or 3 had some something that I forgot about, or hubby made plans and didn't tell me (more likely I just forgot, but that's another story) and then I won't be able to fulfill that YES. YES is final. I need to be fluid. I need to adjust when needed and I don't feel like bearing a bunch of guilt in the process.

Am I crazy or can you relate?
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