Thursday, October 27, 2011

come visit me!

Today I'm posting over at Momalom!  Jen and Sarah have quite the site and following.  It was their Five for Ten series that motivated me into this blogging world.  Now I have the honor of posting for their MomMamaMommy! series.  I owe them lots for this wonderful community I've discovered.

Head on over and see what I have to say about the dynamics of three.  While you're there, check out their writing in the archives, subscribe to their feed and add them to your Twitter list.  Enjoy!

Monday, October 24, 2011


My heart is here but my head isn't.  Words and ideas swirl in my head like the dead leaves outside on a brisk fall day.  They click as they rustle never seeming to settle down.

I am disconnected, outside looking in.  Lurking.  I sit on the periphery engaging only sporadically.  Unfortunately in both the real and virtual worlds.

I am not living up to the title of this blog.  I am not saying all I want to say.  I've written before about how I cannot wear a veil.  I can make excuses but mostly I am stifled.  It appears that if I cannot write with honesty about things that matter, then I cannot write at all.  It feels false and unworthy of my time.

I need to find a balance though because I miss the community.  I miss the engagement at a time when I need it the most.   Of course my real-world friends are here for me but there's something to be said for the online world.  It is always "on" with no need to coordinate schedules, drive anywhere or find babysitters.  You can reach out and find people to connect with regardless of, maybe even because of, your idiosyncrasies.  At any given time you can find someone.  And it's good to have someone even if there are words left unspoken.

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

My Pink Network

Christine over at Coffees and Commutes wrote about her Pink Network and inspired me to write about mine.  

I've always considered myself to be "one of the guys" and valued that classification.   It was difficult for me to make friends with girls.  Their interests were not my own; their games repulsive at times.  But I've always had a few girl friends - and a few good ones at that.  So few that I can recount everyone of them since elementary school. 

Of course my first girl friend was my sister.  Growing up we had this love-hate relationship but if either of us was in trouble, we had each other's back - no questions asked. 

And then there was Laura.  We played Barbie dolls forever, took rides around the block, got stung by bees and swam all summer long.  Brenda and I stole cigarettes from our mothers' packs and hid out by the barn, coughing and hacking away.  Iris was there as we hung out and did science projects together.  We fell out of touch but as weird things go, we ended up renting rooms in the same house our senior year in college.  Freaky. 

High school was such a miserable time in my life.  I hated it.  I hated the girls.  I hated the popularity contest.  I didn't fit in with any click even though it was a school of 1,600+.  But there were a few shiny pinks in the midst - Ellen with her gorgeous hair - dark auburn with this natural curl you could never fake with a bottle of perming solution.  Michelle, Kathy, Heather - those were my girls - and thanks to Facebook we had a bit of a reunion a few summers ago.  I don't keep in touch as much as I'd like, but I still feel close to them.

College was a small but awesome pink experience.  There were really only two friends for me - Rebecca and Kim.  All three of us RAs.  You know, Resident Assistants, those pesky annoying people who made you follow the rules in your dorm.  We were all very different then, and yet not so much.  We shared less than ideal childhoods and we all took that damn job because we needed it to get through school.  Interestingly enough, we all got degrees in education.  I've lost touch with Rebecca even though we still exchange Christmas cards.  But, I know if I picked up the phone and we both (miraculously) had a spare minute to talk, we'd be right back in the thick of it.

Kim I'm a little more connected with courtesy of Facebook.  Here is another freaky story.  Kim is still back in Connecticut and she married her high school sweetheart, Tim.  Tim has a brother Jonathan.  Jonathan lives in California.  One day I got a note from Kim saying that her brother-in-law moved to my town.  Not only did he move to my town, but he moved to about a mile away and now Kim's sister-in-law is one of my trusted friends, and part of my pink network.  Small world, huh?  Kim also was my first real pink experience.  She is a survivor - going on 10 years now.

And my pink network - we are a grounded set of girls.  I have friends like Cheryl (who married my ex-boyfriend - I know another freaky), LouAnne, Dee and Kim who have been friends for life - at least my life in California.   They have seen me at my worst and they have seen me at my best.   I have Leslie, Shawn and Erin - pool teammates I'm out with every Wednesday.  It's my one night out a week whether I need it or not.  Then there are Andrea, Jules, Brooke, Sonia, Larra and Barbara - the local girls always ready for a cosmo and a conversation.  And last I mention are the women who have bumped me up professionally.  Lucy, Susan (also a survivor) and Alisa, Valerie, Hope and Megan, most recently Barb.   These are the girls in my life and I would like them to stay here.

October is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month.  Do something.  For me, I support Susan G. Komen For The Cure.  Be aware.  Be generous.  Be true to your pink.